98 lines
4.2 KiB
Markdown
98 lines
4.2 KiB
Markdown
- [ ] Write
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- [ ] what I thunk of the farm
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- [ ] what I think of SC as a concept
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- [ ] what I think of SC as a business
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- [ ] what I think I should do, what the future could look like, how to ride it
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- [ ] Listen to Anxiety
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- [ ] Read SC agreement
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<<<<<<< Updated upstream
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<<<<<<< Updated upstream
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- [ ]
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=======
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=======
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>>>>>>> Stashed changes
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https://substack.com/home/post/p-171966411
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# Journaling
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People create their problems by having the wrong attitude before God.
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I have been given the gift of some time here in the afternoon on a sunny Tuesday in the middle of harvest. Thank you.
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### Repentance
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Lord, I repent of sentimentalism. Of looking for right feelings. Of trying to feel my way into the right course of action. The emotions are calls for investigation. They are not investigation. I repent that I have misused them.
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That doesn't mean they should be disregarded. In fact I have disregarded them in many ways.
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### Raw gut feelings
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Here are some raw gut feelings I have. They may or may not be accurate.
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1. The farm is really disordered. It is too big. It is too empty. We run too hard during harvest.
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2. My father is not well-equipped to manage a work crew.
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3. Stock Cropper is not a very good idea as it currently exists. If it is to exist it needs a drastic tech scale-back.
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1. A tech scale-back in a tech company? This is weird. It may be right and just but it raises fundamental questions.
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2. Animals need space to roam.
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3. What is the goal here? What are we trying to serve? What are we trying to do?
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4. Is the noncompete OK?
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4. I am ordering so much stuff from Amazon and other outside entities in general. It takes a lot of tools to make things work around here.
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5. Do I just need to directly work to make a living / help those around me?
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1. can it be the farm?
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2. can it be engineering stuff?
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3. it can't be this grain farming nonsense
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6. Am I going to need to leave here?
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1. I am not really tethered still
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2. But I still feel somewhat responsible for my family. They are a mess.
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7. Are my talents of more use ecclesially? Particularly, taste, intellect, virtue
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8. Sheep aren't gaining like they ought to be.
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9. I'm not helping THF like I ought to be.
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10. I'm stretched thin.
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11. I have no social life right now.
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12. My social prospects are not well.
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13. Everything is becoming fake.
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14. We need to solve real problems, not move deck chairs. What are the real problems?
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1. Lack of togetherness
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2. Lack of good food
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3. Lack of good work
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4. Lack of good spaces
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5. Food. Work. Spaces. Music and liturgy too. But food. Work. Spaces. These are the basics.
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15. Ousett's *Action* is convicting.
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### The pressing questions
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1. Do I take the SC agreement, or leave it?
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2. Do I move out of the house (either to Joyce, or Kathy's)?
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3. What do I need to focus on?
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### What is the most impressive/important angle?
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Item 14 above. Solve real problems, don't move deck chairs. Quality food, work, spaces. How to get here?
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##### A direct approach - same place, different focus?
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- Move more acreage over to livestock production
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- Build a house - no, build several houses - build a neighborhood
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##### The things that are in front of me
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- Build up StockCropper
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- Use that tech to convert acreage to livestock production
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##### I feel like I need better options.
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The room holds us, but sometimes, that’s not why we stay. We actually stay because we don’t yet know how to live without its framing.
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I don't need to solve everything now
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But I also shouldn't make excuses...
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Make no compromise with evil
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### Listing perspectives
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- You SHOULD - it has been presented to you
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- You SHOULD - it is a way to knit your talents with the right direction
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- You SHOULD NOT - it is not really the endpoint; it is too technologically complicated
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- You SHOULD NOT - it is not a shape of work that you can pass on
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- You SHOULD NOT - it is not social enough
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- You SHOULD - there can be other fruits that come of this
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- You SHOULD - it is a way to grow in knowledge and ability to make things
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- You SHOULD NOT - you need to be invested and in the driver's seat
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<<<<<<< Updated upstream
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- You SHOULD NOT - you are too geographically decentered
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>>>>>>> Stashed changes
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=======
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- You SHOULD NOT - you are too geographically decentered
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>>>>>>> Stashed changes
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