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Archive/Journal/# 2024-01-30.md

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+# 2024-01-30
+
+## Vent - *All of it, out!*
+I AM FURIOUS THAT SOLIDWORKS COSTS SO MUCH
+And that I said I'd do this job
+What the hell
+why won't my laser cutter cut through baltic birch consistently? Is it something blocking? Is it the laser dying out for a sec? I need to change the water.
+I don't feel 100% at ease with this
+can i drum up additional work to make the investment worthwhile?
+i need to talk with farmers that are doing cool stuff
+i need to talk with people in general that are doing cool stuff
+does metalcow have a good connection to a var?
+it probably wouldn't matter though
+man software is such a scam
+why is the purely software stuff open-sourcey but hardware isn't?
+is it because it doesn't build on top of itself? software is a very rhyming ecosystem
+i need a spiritual director
+its so weird talking to people in the state that i am in
+what do i want to do? too much? not enough?
+i want to raise cows
+live with good people
+can i make my family good people
+can i make my area good
+is it possible at all
+it feels like the answer may be a pretty solid "no"
+yet where is adventure calling exactly?
+
+hello, deep unsettledness
+
+i don't know what to do with you
+you're horribly unproductive
+you say EVERYTHING is awful
+you say I am awful
+you say this world is awful
+and irredeemable
+get out
+never come back
+get out
+never come back
+get out
+never
+come
+back
+
+yet why does it feel good to wallow?
+like its the only appropriate thing to do
+
+when was the last good day you had?
+the barn raising.
+especially the night before.
+I think that might have been the best day of my life.
+
+We *did* that. It was *good*.
+
+Why am I not chasing that
+why am i not back there
+why am i not working with my hands, in community
+can i work for the outfit in paxton?
+
+Actually, I had another good day. Recently. At the shop with my grandpa.
+
+I had another good day, too. Installing the cabinet at Cedars.
+
+
+
+## Obligations - *list, then prioritize, and set the bare minimum*
+- Go to soil conference
+- Finish auger mover prototype
+- Send asks to farmers
+- Resolve my CAD situation
+- Clarify my TH Fab situation
+
+... that's the minimum.
+
+## Mindset - *Tools: Reframe, Possibility, Inversion, Perspective, Discipline*
+
+
+## Ideate - *Make 30 answers in 5 minutes! No editing til it's over*
+
+How to fix solidworks issue?
+- Just buy the damn license
+- Just buy a 3 month license
+- Buy a different CAD package and import STEP files. That one that starts with A.
+- Borrow Jon's license (you don't need that much for this project anyways)
+- Use FreeCAD
+- Use TeamViewer to remote desktop into Jon's computer
+- Use Remote Desktop into Jon's computer - use a separate login for security reasons
+- The prototype will just be some specced pulleys, sprockets, and a plate - just fabricobble it
+- Convince Jon to switch to a different CAD software
+- Find someone who will resell a SW seat
+- Get a deal cut on a SW seat
+- Take on more jobs to justify buying a SW license
+	- Online freelancing
+	- Furniture design company
+	- Support my own ventures legitimately
+	- Bring my friends' ideas to life
+	- Drawings for companies
+	- Designer for local fab shops (reach out)
+	- Reverse engineer ag parts
+- Make a makerspace; a real SOLIDWORKS seat at a desktop PC is a perk
+- Convince VAR to not sell me the cloud nonsense
+
+OK, there are options.
+
+## Trajectory - *What's the evidence for your goals - and what will you do? What are the hidden metrics?*
+
+## WHAT ARE YOU DOING TOMORROW?
+- Exercise
+- Packing up business cards, zines, notebook
+- Going to cover crop conference
+- Calling VARs
+- Writing down list of concerns / what I want to do next for Jon
+- Talk with Niko